eliteladiesdating com - Dating a really nice guy

I reiterate old themes, try to put things into a much-needed perspective. And find out the next time she’s available to talk on the phone.” I’m a big believer in the phone. I don’t want her to think I’m too interested.” An old wives’ tale, I assure him.

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I remind him that at a party, she doesn’t have a hundred men lined up to talk to her. The strength of online dating lies in its ability to give us access to total strangers; the downside is how difficult it is to keep their attention. Finally, we get to talking about the woman he’s writing to. I wrote about this extensively in a chapter from “Why You’re Still Single” creatively called “Don’t Play Games”, but to reiterate: NOTHING GOOD COMES OUT OF PLAYING GAMES. None of those things prevent a guy from being nice. Kindness without confidence is the charge against the wishy-washy “nice guys”.

They spoke on the phone last night for the first time. But if you put confidence and kindness together…well, I’d say you have a pretty irresistible combination of traits for a man. Confident men keep their plans after they make them.

Yet, when it comes down to it, women consistently chase after the “bad boy,” the guy who is narcissistic, self-absorbed and avoids all forms of intimacy as if they were infectious diseases. While women claim to want “the nice guy,” we’re genetically hard-wired to want to procreate with the alpha male because he has stronger sperm.

A woman’s dating preference is the ultimate paradox. In two studies highlighted in “Sex Roles, A Journal of Research,” the “nice guy paradox” is explored.

While I’m not criticizing the seduction community, it’s important to understand where they fit in.

If you’re looking for one night stands, looking to pick up that hot girl just for tonight, looking to be a pickup artist – that stuff will do wonders.

But you can’t beat that quiet inner confidence which doesn’t compare to the fake stuff. And starting off by playing games and pretending to be something you’re not will get you single over and over again.

Most women claim to want the guy who is sensitive, emotionally fluent and intimate. We are literally, scientifically geared to want assh*les.

He tells me that he doesn’t want to have to lower his standards for online dating. I let him know that it’s a burden for these women – and that lots of great guys get lost in the shuffle. Just like a baseball player fails 7 times out of 10, an online dater is going to get a lot more rejection than acceptance. And “The Rules” talks about waiting a week in between conversations to build up anticipation and establish that you’re busy.” I’m paraphrasing, of course. Ask most women what they’re looking for and you’ll get some version of “a nice guy with a little bit of an edge”. They just don’t want a guy who values himself so little that he has to try so very hard to impress.

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